Teaching Kids How to Communicate with Autistic Adults

We often hear that “communication is key” when it comes to strong friendships and relationships. That’s true for every stage of life—whether it’s on the playground, at school, at work, or in our personal lives.

At Simple Spectrum, we usually focus on supporting children with Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD), but today we want to look ahead. As our children grow into adulthood, they’ll encounter new opportunities to build relationships with autistic adults—whether family members, coworkers, neighbors, or friends.

The way we teach children about communication and respect today can shape how future generations connect with the autism community tomorrow.

 

Understanding Autism

Before children can learn how to communicate effectively, it’s important that they understand what autism is—and what it isn’t.

Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) is a neurodevelopmental condition that affects how people experience the world and interact with others. Because autism exists on a spectrum, no two people with ASD are exactly the same. As autistic professor Dr. Stephen Shore put it:

“If you’ve met one individual with autism, you’ve met one individual with autism.”

That means your child may meet autistic adults who communicate in very different ways. Some may be highly verbal, others may prefer few words or alternative communication methods. Some may love eye contact, others may avoid it.

Here are some common traits (though not universal) that children should know about autism:

  • May use less eye contact or different body language
  • Sometimes don’t respond when spoken to, even if listening
  • May engage in movements like rocking or hand-flapping
  • Might struggle to “read” facial expressions or tone of voice
  • Often have strong, focused interests in specific topics
  • May have sensory sensitivities (to clothing, sounds, lights, textures, or foods)
  • Can have excellent memory or deep knowledge in certain areas

 

How Kids Can Communicate with Autistic Adults

It’s important to remind children that autistic adults deserve the same respect as any adult. They may communicate differently, but they should still be treated with kindness, dignity, and equality.

Here are three simple tips you can teach your child:

1. Be Direct

Instead of relying on hints, jokes, or facial cues, encourage your child to use clear words when speaking with autistic adults. Direct communication is often easier to understand and helps avoid confusion.

2. Be Patient

Conversations may not always follow the same rhythm your child is used to. Let them know it’s okay to pause, wait, and give the other person time to respond.

3. Be Respectful

Just like with any adult, remind your child to use polite manners and show respect. Encourage them to see autistic adults as role models and equals, not as “different” or “less than.”

 

Why This Matters

When children learn about autism early on, they grow up with greater empathy, understanding, and inclusion. This benefits not just the autism community, but society as a whole.

At Simple Spectrum, we believe that supporting development means more than nutrition—it also means fostering knowledge, compassion, and respect. By teaching our children to communicate with autistic adults, we’re building a more inclusive future, one conversation at a time.

 

Parent Takeaway:

  • Teach your child that autism is a spectrum and looks different for each person.
  • Encourage direct, patient, and respectful communication.
  • Model inclusive behavior so your child learns from your example.

 

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